Ouch

I have Lupus. It is S.L.E to some, Systemic Lupus Erithematosus to the knowledgeable and meaningless to most. I was one of the most about a decade ago.

Systemic Lupus is an autoimmune condition. It is a connective tissue disease, - a chronic, inflammatory condition that happens when the body’s immune system attacks its own tissues and organs. It can be controlled by drugs, but not cured and is adversely affected from exposure to sunlight, stress and strain.

Lupus in Latin meanswolf. And Erithematosus means redness of the skin caused by dilatation and congestion of the capillaries, often a sign of inflammation or infection.

Inflammation caused by lupus can affect many different body systems, including joints, skin, kidneys, blood cells, heart, and lungs and the central nervous system.

In my case - joints, skin and blood cells are involved.

Lupus for me mostly means moderate to severe-ish body ache, – the kind of body ache that accompanies a very bad attack of flue.

I also have painful joints and constant low-grade fever.

The fever is totally draining. Then there are the dry, blistering mucous membranes – Sjogren’s syndrome. Sometimes my eyes are so dry that I can't move them.

Viral and fungal infections are another bane, and treatment for these are difficult as the drugs can be toxic.

There is a mental scale that I measure my pain by. So on a scale of zero to ten, my pain level is between five, to six and a half. I have left the other three and a half for any future progression, because I would like to have a few more decades to look forward to. I intend to spend a lot of time in the forest and on the mountains.

I want to emphasise that this scale is applicable to my personal condition only. Others may have a lower or higher tolerance to pain. So their scale would be different.

Also, this scale is in no way a reference to the pain of any acute conditions, - surgeries, accidents, or acute painful illnesses.

Lupus pain is constant and numbing. When it is at six and a half, I am dizzy and nauseous. My dream massage would be one with a contraption that is a combination of the pressure of a road roller and an elephant’s walk. But a massage feels good only while is happening. The minute it stops, the pain is right back again.

My nervous system is possibly also shot, or may be its just the effect of the drugs.

I have some of the symptoms - confusion, fatigue, memory impairment, and difficulty expressing my thoughts.

But these have been the cause of much hilarity and belly laugh among my friends, so I shall consider them a silver lining. I will be writing about some of the occasions later sometime.

Before I was diagnosed with Lupus, I would tan a beautiful caramel within a few hours in the sun. I used to be so proud of my colour, and how much I showed it off. Then I got to know that it was a symptom of the condition!

Happiness!

What is bothersome ‘though is the often discoloured, angry Malar Rash, or the butterfly rash that appears on the bridge of the nose and then spreads to the cheek bones on both sides of the face.

For a person as vain as I am, this can be terribly depressing. But then again, often it is like a red stain that makes me look rosy and fresh.

I can totally put up with that!