Warning! A Self-Centered Crib

This is just the kind of blog I hate to write, but today this is all that I can think about.

The last couple of days I have been unwell. The Lupusy kind of unwell that is hard to describe. I am achey, have constant low temperature, swollen watering eyes that keep closing, drowsiness, brain fog and an oozy mind.

The narco painkiller with paracetamol, takes the edge off, but obviously there is a lot more behind the edge.

Today is the pits - really! It is no point even trying to describe what is wrong.

I had a screaming match with my daughter last Friday and Saturday. Stressor. Monday and Tuesday evenings I went to see my sister perform. I was driven, got good seats, had taken all the meds and precautions necessary. There was no strain at all, but my body thinks there was. So here I am, in bed, jumping at the least sound. Even brushing my teeth is a problem. Incase you are thinking I don’t – I do.

What is worrying me now is that I think I am hitting on the depression mode - not the clinical kind - but the fed up kind. I hope it doesn't get worse

For the first time ever since I became house bound, I think today I will ask a friend to come and spend some time with me. I hate doing this - prefer to let them make their own time. I don't want them to think they 'need' to see me. But today I ‘need’ to call in a favour.

I have been reading. I have two Ngaio Marshe’s books to read now. ‘Just finished Lionel Shriver’s latest.

Visiting the forums, when I can, also feels good. The folks there are real troopers, in spite of being ill themselves, they never fail to support big time. I suppose one of the reasons I manage to spend so much time on my own is because they are always there.

I wish I could thank them all on this blog individually, but I doubt they would want that. But thank you - all of you.